Setting - during ANH and ESB

Author - Angela Jade

e-mail - angela_jade@bigfoot.com - constructive criticism and happy thoughts greatly appreciated ... please don’t flame me!

Category - PWP/Seduction

Rated - NC17 - you have been warned!

Status - complete

Summary - Luke's first time. :) Then the relationship gets a bit weird. Some smut, some angst - enjoy!

Feel free to post this story wherever, as long as it’s got this spiel at the top.

Disclaimer - all these characters, apart from Kay (who belongs to me!), belong to Mr. Lucas (we are not worthy...) I write about them as a form of flattery - please don’t sue. I am not making any money from this.

Dedication - to all my 'thirty-something' female friends, and to all my male friends who haven't 'done it' yet. You all know who you are...
 
 

‘Experienced’ (Stock/Waterman):
“Everybody needs someone
To show them how
Even though her touch
Is just a memory now
I won’t forget that moment
I lost my innocence
The day I became
Experienced”
 
 

Chapter 1 - A New Hope
 

I first saw him in the main hanger on Yavin. News had reached us of Alderaan’s destruction, and rumour had it that Princess Leia was joining our little band full-time. She eventually landed in some beat-up old Corellian freighter that looked totally out of place next to the X-wings; the ship’s crew looked a bit out of place, too. We didn’t have many Wookiees in the Rebel Alliance, and there weren’t many protocol droids about the place either. The ship’s captain looked like he wanted to take off again straight away. Then I saw him. He looked so young and innocent, his piercing blue eyes sweeping the hanger, taking everything in. His eyes met mine briefly, but he was more interested in the X-wing I was working on. Great, I thought, another wannabe pilot. But I’d been with the rebellion for six years by then, and had seen plenty of rookies in that time. There was something different about this one. I couldn’t put my finger on it, it just felt like something in the atmosphere changed as he walked past me.

‘He’s a bit young for you, isn’t he?’
 
I looked up to see Wedge Antilles leaning against the nose of the fighter. ‘I don’t know what you’re talking about, Antilles,’ I replied. ‘And stop leaning on my ship. You’ll damage the paintwork.’
 
Grinning, he patted the X-wing. ‘Nope. It’s my ship. And stop trying to change the subject.’
 
I stood up so I could look him in the eye. ‘While I’m working on it, it’s my ship. And I’m not trying to change the subject. I have no idea what you’re talking about.’
 
His grin widened, but I noticed he stopped leaning on the fighter. ‘That boy that just landed with the princess. You know, the short, blonde one. I saw how you looked at him.’
 
‘He didn’t look any shorter than you, Antilles. Not much younger either.’ I took a couple of steps towards him. ‘And just because I’ve turned down all your little advances, doesn’t mean to say I can’t look at other men.’
 
‘Oh, come on, Kay. Wouldn’t you rather go out with a nice Corellian like me.’
 
Inwardly I smiled. Wedge had been hitting on me for a couple of months, ever since his last girlfriend had dumped him. It was kind of fun and broke the tedium, although we both knew I was never going to say yes. ‘I think I’d rather go out with the Wookiee.’
 
He opened his mouth to reply, then closed it again when he saw another pilot running over towards us. ‘What’s up Biggs?’
 
Biggs glanced at me, then looked at Wedge. ‘That was Luke.’
 
‘Luke? Luke who?’ asked Wedge.
 
‘Luke Skywalker.’ Biggs sounded exasperated. ‘I told you about him. From Tatooine. He’s an ace pilot.’
 
Wedge looked sceptical. ‘He’s a kid.’
 
But Biggs wasn’t really listening. ‘He must be nearly nineteen by now. Wonder how he managed to get in tow with the princess. More to the point, how did he ever get away from that uncle of his.’ He turned back to face Wedge. ‘We have to get him in the sims. He’s really good. Honestly.’
 
Wedge raised an eyebrow at me before turning back to his friend. ‘Well, why don’t you go tell Red Leader then.’
 
‘Hmm?’ Biggs tore his gaze away from the exit Luke had just taken. ‘Red Leader. Okay.’
 
Wedge watched him wander off before turning his attention back to me. ‘So, how about it, Kay? Any chance of a date?’
 
‘I don’t think so, Wedge,’ I replied. ‘You know I only go for blondes.’ I knelt back down to my work.
 
I only jumped a little when I felt his hands on my shoulders. He whispered in my ear, ‘You are incorrigible.’
 

I heard later that day that Luke had done pretty well in the simulators and they were going to let him fly. Then it was a mad panic to get all the X-wings space-worthy - the Death Star was on its way. As a senior technician I spent most of my time chasing up everyone else; I had little time to contemplate the possibility of my imminent death. I wasn’t at the briefing but I met up with Wedge afterwards and he told me what they had to do. I didn’t voice my opinion that it sounded impossible. I didn’t have to. Wedge looked determined, but I could tell he was scared. I pulled him into my arms and hugged him as tight as I could.
 
‘Go get the bad guys, Antilles.’
 
He pulled away, his innocent young eyes gazing into mine. ‘Are you going to come for a drink with me yet?’
 
I smiled and pushed him away. ‘I’ll let you buy me a drink when you bring my X-wing back intact.’
 
He smiled nervously as he climbed into the cockpit. ‘I’ll hold you to that.’
 
I gave him the thumbs-up then ducked under the nose of the fighter on my way to check another of my charges. I suppose I regarded the X-wings as my babies, but the pilots as my kid brothers. I was only twenty-seven standard years old, but most of the pilots were so much younger than me; I felt a bit nervous when they flew on training flights, let alone battles. I saw Porkins struggling a bit with his restraints and jumped up the ladder to help him. He smiled at me. ‘Thanks, Kay. I think I’m a bit nervous.’
 
I patted his shoulder. ‘First time for everything, Porkins. Good luck!’
 
Next stop was Biggs, who had already closed his canopy. I waved and he waved back, as the noise of repulsors filled the hanger.
 
I saw Luke sitting in the cockpit of his assigned X-wing, although he hadn’t closed the canopy. He was staring at the controls and I thought I’d better check he was coping. I hopped up the ladder. ‘You okay, Skywalker?’
 
He looked up at me. ‘What?’
 
Blue eyes. Really blue eyes. I’m a sucker for blue eyes. I felt my mouth curl into a smile. ‘I asked if you were alright. You look a little lost.’
 
He smiled back, the blue eyes lighting up. ‘I think so. Everything seems to be happening so fast.’
 
I patted his shoulder. ‘You’ll be fine.’ I hated the Empire for making us send these kids into battle. They should be at home with their parents, not fighting for freedom. I kept the false smile on my face as I slid down the ladder and indicated that he should get moving. I watched him close the canopy, then ran towards the exit as fighters started slowly moving.
 
I headed up to the main lounge to listen to the battle. It was crowded but I soon realised that many of my compatriots were missing. I found out later that many had gone to get drunk or to get laid. Understandable reaction. The lounge was deathly quiet as we strained to hear what was going on. A lifetime later (or was it just half an hour) the whole place erupted with cheers when we realised the Death Star had been destroyed. I hugged so many people that day, then I went back to my room and cried for the pilots we’d lost. I couldn’t even face going down to the hanger to meet the survivors. I’d only just dried my tears and washed my face when I heard a knock at my door. It swished open to reveal Wedge, still in his flight suit. He lifted me off the ground and twirled me round, before pulling me into a tight hug that nearly squeezed the life out of me.
 
‘Gods, Kay,’ he said, ‘I can’t believe we did it.’ He pulled back then, frowning. ‘Are you okay?’
 
I brushed the hair out of his eyes and hugged him again. ‘I’m just upset about the guys we lost.’
 
I felt his hands on my shoulders as he forced me to look at him. ‘We know what we’re getting into, Kay.’ He sighed. ‘I know you see most of us as kids but when we’re up there we’re just pilots.’
 
I looked down. ‘I know. It’s just...’
 
His finger under my chin pulled my face up to his. ‘Just nothing, Kay. You do your job, let me do mine.’ A cheeky grin lit up his face. ‘What about that drink you agreed to.’
 
I smiled a little. ‘I do believe my X-wing has not returned entirely intact, Antilles.’
 
‘Then I shall just have to buy you two to make up for it.’
 
I pushed him away. ‘At least. Sit down while I get ready.’
 
I don’t know which of us was more surprised.
 

That evening, the Grand Chamber was turned into one big party. The Force knows where all the streamers and balloons came from, let alone the band and vast quantities of alcohol. We knew we had very little time before the Imperial Fleet came after us, and we were determined to make the most of it. I’d actually put on a dress for the evening and had spent the past hour putting up with sarcastic comments from all who knew me. Wedge had bought me my two drinks and had just gone to get a third, when I felt a familiar presence behind me. I turned round and saw Luke sit at the table beside me; I knew it was him even before I saw him.
 
‘How are you, Skywalker?’
 
I watched the light dawn behind his eyes, recognition slowly crossing his face. He grinned. ‘Not bad.’ He held out his hand. ‘Please call me Luke.’
 
I shook his hand. ‘Kay. I’m Senior Technician on Red Squadron.’
 
‘Those X-wings fly like a dream.’ That familiar far-away look came into his eyes; I’d seen it in every pilot I’d met. His gaze met mine again. ‘Thanks.’
 
‘Just doing my job,’ I replied. But it’s always nice to be appreciated, I thought. ‘So why aren’t you surrounded by adoring groupies?’
 
He leaned in, just a little. ‘To be honest, I don’t think anyone recognises me.’
 
‘I could announce you, if you like.’
 
A look of horror crossed his face. ‘Oh, no. Please don’t.’
 
I felt guilty then. ‘I won’t. I’m only teasing.’
 
Just then the main door squeaked open a little wider and Han Solo came in, a girl on each arm. He was heading straight for us and Luke looked absolutely terrified. ‘Help,’ he whispered.
 
I grabbed his arm and pulled him towards the dance floor. ‘Come on, flyboy. Give this old dame a dance. The big, bad captain won’t get you.’
 
His eyes flicked from Captain Solo to me. ‘Do you dance with all the pilots?’
 
I draped my arms round his neck and felt his arms sneak tentatively round my waist. ‘Only the nice ones.’ I think the wine that Wedge had been pouring down my neck had finally gotten to me.
 
He looked at me from under his lashes. ‘You don’t look that old.’
 
‘Twenty-seven,’ I replied.
 
‘I’m nineteen.’
 
‘Biggs said you were still eighteen.’ I knew as soon as the words left my mouth that it was the wrong thing to say. He looked down and swallowed hard.
 
‘He’s gone,’ he whispered. ‘He was my friend and the only one here that I knew and he’s gone. He died saving my life.’
 
I pulled him a little closer. ‘He died saving all our lives.’
 
He looked at me, tears just threatening to fall. ‘I wish he hadn’t.’
 
‘I knew him, too, Luke. And all the others.’
 
We danced in silence for a while, until the music came to an end. I could see Han Solo surrounded by pilots and women and judged it was safe to return to our table. I took Luke’s hand and led him back, only to find an impatient Wedge at the table.
 
‘Kay,’ he smiled, looking more than a little mischievous. ‘I see you got your blonde.’ I could have happily strangled him there and then. Thankfully, Luke seemed to miss the comment completely.
 
I downed half my drink and then pulled Wedge towards the dance floor. ‘Come on then, Antilles. Let’s see if you can dance as well as you fly.’
 

The party finished just a couple of hours later, as per orders. The evacuation of the base would start first thing in the morning, and I for one had a mountain of work to do. I left Wedge fawning over some young blonde girl and went to say goodbye to my other friends. There was more ribbing about me wearing a dress (honestly, what did they think I had under my fatigues), then I went over to say goodbye to Luke. He was surrounded by pilots and wannabe pilots, including Han Solo, who was recounting their adventures to an appreciative audience. Every time Luke tried to edge away, Solo grabbed his arm and asked his opinion on something. I caught Luke’s eye and I’ll swear I heard a faint ‘get me out of this’, although his lips never moved. I winked at him, then forced my way into the middle of the group. ‘Come on Luke,’ I said, pulling him gently away from Solo and friends. ‘You promised me one last dance.’ I flashed the men a dazzling smile before putting my arm round Luke’s waist and propelling him towards the dance floor. I heard at least one ‘who’s that?’ before Solo resumed his tale.
 
Once on the dance floor, I realised that Solo had probably been keeping Luke vertical. He was rather drunk. His arms went round my waist and he pulled me close, before resting his head on my shoulder. I have to say, I didn’t object. When the music stopped he lifted his head and looked into my eyes. ‘Can I walk you home, Kay?’ He was still swaying slightly, but at least he remembered my name.
 
‘I doubt it, Skywalker. How much have you had to drink?’
 
He rubbed his eyes and pushed a hand through his hair. ‘Not enough. I can still remember.’
 
I linked my arm through his and steered him towards the main door. ‘Can you remember which room they gave you?’
 
He pursed his lips and thought for a moment. ‘Twenty-something. I’m sharing with Wedge.’
 
I glanced back to Antilles who was now smooching with his new ‘friend’, his hand slowly edging up her skirt; I’d have to remember to tease him about her in the morning. ‘Somehow, Luke, I don’t think you’re going to be very welcome there just now. You’d better come back with me and I’ll make you a hot drink. It might sober you up a bit.’
 

We walked back to my room a bit slower than I would have liked, but I was still struggling slightly to keep Luke vertical. As I palmed the door open, he turned and smiled at me, planting a kiss on my forehead. ‘Thank you,’ he said, before stumbling into my apartment and collapsing on a couch. He smiled as he watched me cross over to the kitchen area to fix some drinks. I hoped he’d sober up a bit soon - I felt he was a bit young to be this drunk. But then, he was a bit young to be going around blowing up battle stations.
 
I handed him his drink and watched as he screwed his nose up. ‘What’s this?’
 
‘Tea,’ I replied. ‘Drink it.’
 
‘Do I have to?’
 
‘Yes. And don’t whine.’ I looked into his eyes as he stared at me over the rim of his cup. ‘You’re not a kid anymore.’
 
His eyes lingered on mine for just a moment too long, before dropping back down to his cup. ‘I am in some ways.’
 
Huh? What the hell was that supposed to mean? ‘Sorry, Luke, you’ve lost me.’
 
He sipped his tea, a small smile playing over his lips. ‘I’ve done so much over the past few days, I can hardly believe it.’ He sighed, then looked up to meet my gaze once more. ‘Promise you won’t tell?’
 
‘Tell? Tell what?’ I had a niggling feeling of what he was about to tell me.
 
‘I’m a virgin.’
 
I had heard the expression ‘blushing to the roots of your hair’ before, but had never seen it so graphically demonstrated. He really did seem to go red all over. Poor kid. He looked down into his tea.
 
‘I won’t tell, Luke.’
 
‘Would you do something for me?’ The eyes again. Why the hell did he have to have blue eyes.
 
‘That depends on what you want me to do, Luke.’
 
‘Take it away.’ His voiced cracked almost imperceptibly.
 
‘Take what away?’
 
His lower lip trembled ever so slightly as he set his cup down. ‘Take away the pain. I don’t think I can do this war-hero stuff I’m supposed to do if all I can think of is how many people have died so far...’
 
I had put my own cup on the table and I pulled him into a hug. He put his head on my shoulder and I could hear him gently crying. I realised tears were running down my own face. He pulled back slightly, his face centimetres from mine. ‘Will the pain go away?’
 
I could lose myself in those eyes. ‘It’ll get better with time.’ Gods, I sounded like an old woman.
 
He did it then, blew all my self-control. He leaned in and kissed me. I’ll swear it was the sweetest, most gentle kiss I have ever had. And I’ve had a few, believe me. A virgin he may have been, but he’d obviously kissed some girls in his time; this was not the kiss of a beginner. My hands moved up to his face and we gently parted, our eyes locking once more.
 
‘Kay, can I sleep with you tonight?’
 
I was going to say no, I really was. He was so young, so innocent. I didn’t sleep with everyone I met (much to Wedge’s chagrin) but I had had several partners and I knew how the game was played. At least, I thought I knew. But the Empire could come along any day now and blast us to bits - they’d come damn close that day. So did it really matter if I took this boy’s innocence away?
 
‘Luke, I hardly know you. Don’t you think you should wait for someone...’ He kissed me again and I could taste the salt tears on his lips as he pulled me in closer.
 
Then our foreheads touched and I could see his eyes through his lashes. ‘Please? I don’t want to wait any longer, and I don’t think I can bear to be alone tonight. I promise I won’t bother you again, if you don’t want me to.’
 
I couldn’t think of anything else to say, so I stood up, took his hand, and led him to the bedroom. I knew it was probably a bad move, but I didn’t want to be on my own either.
 
He let me undress him, then I took off my dress and I joined him under the cover. I gazed into his eyes as I pushed his hair out of his face. ‘You don’t have to do this. Just say if you want me to stop.’
 
His hand reached up and caressed my face. ‘I want to do this. I think I need to do this.’ He kissed me and suddenly my apprehension vanished. I hadn’t been much older than he was when I’d lost my own virginity, and he was ready for this, that much I could tell. Maybe we would fall in love, maybe we wouldn’t. But right now we were two human beings, hurting like hell in the middle of a galactic war, and right now was all that mattered.
 
I gently pushed him onto his back and kissed his eyes closed. ‘Just lie still for a minute.’ I removed my underwear then snuggled in close to him; I could feel a jolt run through his body as my skin touched his. I slowly ran my hand over his neck, chest and arms, then followed the caresses with small kisses, licks and a few gentle nips. I kissed all over his beautiful, young, taut body, or at least as much as I could comfortably reach. As my kisses reached his abdomen, I gently wrapped my hand round his member and heard the hiss that escaped his lips in response. He was ready, very ready; in fact, if I didn’t get a move on he’d be lucky to last more than two minutes, and that wouldn’t do his ego much good. Still caressing him, I slid up the bed and whispered, ‘are you ready, Luke?’
 
His eyes opened a little and I barely heard him say, ‘what do you want me to do?’
 
‘Nothing,’ I replied. ‘Just try not to come too soon - the longer you can last, the better it will feel.’
 
He nodded and closed his eyes again, swallowing hard. I straddled his hips, then slowly took him inside me, watching his back arch ever so slightly off the bed. As I leaned down to kiss him, he whispered my name and I thought I would come there and then, it sounded so beautiful. I rocked as slowly as I could, gently caressing his chest as his hands crept up my thighs. His eyes opened and I leaned down to kiss him, pushing his teeth apart with my tongue, tasting him at last. He soon got the idea, responding to my kiss and caressing my back and sides. When his hands reached my breasts, I picked up the pace a bit and sat back a little to watch his first true orgasm. My privilege as his teacher. He did pretty well, lasting another five minutes at least before pulling me into a hug and thrusting into me one last time.
 
I slipped off him and put my arm over him, cuddling into his chest and listening to his pounding heart as it slowly returned to normal.
 
He kissed the top of my head. ‘That was amazing. Can we do it again?’
 
I had to smile. ‘I can, Skywalker. But I think you’ll need a rest first.’
 
‘Oh. I hadn’t thought of that.’ He pulled me into a tighter embrace. ‘No regrets, Kay?’
 
‘Nope. You?’
 
I could feel him shaking his head. ‘Not one. And it did help.’ He sighed. ‘Life goes on, doesn’t it.’
 

I awoke an hour or so later to Luke gently stroking my body. ‘I’ve had a rest now,’ he said. It was almost dark in the room, but not dark enough to hide the gleam in his eyes. I was tired and felt like saying no, but I’d agreed to this and was determined to see it through. I’d forgotten what hormones did to a teenage boy.
 
I propped myself up on one elbow and leaned in to kiss him. ‘Okay, Luke. It’s your call.’
 
His hand and eyes continued to drift lazily over my body, helping me wake up. ‘Tell me what you feel.’
 
He said it with so little emotion, it felt like he’d asked me to explain how a sublight engine worked. ‘What do you mean?’
 
He smiled. ‘Well, I’ve got a pretty good idea how my body works.’ His gaze met mine. ‘But not yours. Tell me what you’d like me to do.’ He held my cheek as he kissed me. ‘Teach me.’
 
So I did.
 
I lay back as he caressed and kissed almost every part of my body, guiding him to pleasure spots with hands and words. It felt strange at first, partly because I didn’t really know him, and partly because I felt like I was giving a biology lesson. But it was worth it when I saw the wonder in his eyes when he realised he could make my nipples stand to attention, or cover my body with goose bumps. As he gently stroked my clitoris, my body started to respond and I wished some kind soul had taken it upon themselves to instruct some of my previous lovers in this way.
 
I’d had enough of being passive and pulled him in for a passionate kiss, while reaching down to grab his member. He jumped only a little before responding in kind, his caresses and kisses becoming more urgent. At some unspoken signal he rolled on top of me and gently parted my legs before entering me slowly. I helped him find a comfortable position and only had to remind him to slow down once as he set a satisfying rhythm. This time he lasted a lot longer, and the passion exploded in us both at the same time. I held him tight as he collapsed on top of me.
 
‘Wow,’ he said, when he got his breath back. ‘That was even better than last time.’ The smile on his face almost reached his ears and his blue eyes sparkled. ‘I take it I’ll need another rest.’
 
I pushed him off me, laughing. ‘Actually, Skywalker, I was hoping to sleep until morning. We’ve got a lot of work to do tomorrow.’
 
His face fell and I think he even pouted. ‘But I’m sober now and I feel sad again.’
 
I lay on my back and pulled him to me for a hug, watching his hands as he lazily played with my breasts. ‘Maybe I am too old for you,’ I said. ‘Maybe you need to find yourself a nice eighteen-year-old to spend your time with. I could introduce you to a few, if you want.’
 
‘No, thanks.’ He looked up at me, his head still pillowed against my breast. ‘Can we still be friends after this?’
 
I was a bit surprised by the question. ‘Do you want to be friends?’
 
‘Of course I do. I really like you, Kay.’ He smiled. ‘And not just because you took pity on this poor, innocent farm boy and decided to put him out of his misery.’
 
I kissed his forehead. ‘Then we shall still be friends. But we should probably keep the sex thing secret, at least for a while. My reputation isn’t exactly pure and I wouldn’t want to drag you down with me.’
 
He nodded understanding and went back to playing with my nipples, like a little boy with a new toy. Which I suppose he was.
 

As it was, he woke me again about two hours later, gently stroking my clitoris and licking my breasts. By the time my brain caught up with my body and my eyes actually opened, I was already very aroused, so he got his wish and we screwed again. But this time there was no holding back; I’d make him pay for waking me up. I managed to pull him to the brink and then calm him down at least three times before we climaxed together, and this time he fell asleep almost immediately, utterly exhausted. I dozed off myself, then woke again just as the sun was coming up.
 
I watched him sleep. He looked even younger, if that was possible, his blonde hair falling over his face and his lips slightly parted as his bare chest rose and fell gently. Gods, I thought, I hope I’m not falling in love with him. Sure, I liked them young, but this one seemed a bit too young, and came with a lot of emotional baggage. He was cute, though; I couldn’t resist and kissed his cheek. His gorgeous blue eyes fluttered open and he smiled sleepily at me. Okay, maybe it was alright to fall in love just a little. It was nothing I couldn’t handle. I loved all my pilots, in a way. I was sure Luke Skywalker would be no different. I kissed his lips as softly as I could. ‘Go back to sleep.’
 
 

Chapter 2 - Commander
 

The next two years seemed to pass in a blur of activity as we moved from planet to planet, trying to keep one step ahead of the Empire. More often than not, they were right behind us, chasing us out of whatever system we’d been calling home that month. Rumour had it that Vader himself was hunting us down - I guess destroying the Death Star hadn’t put us in his good books.

Luke and I had become good friends and still occasional lovers - there never seemed to be enough time for proper relationships. I think we managed to keep our liaisons secret from the other pilots and techs, although I always felt Wedge suspected something. I still regarded Wedge as a friend and felt suitably guilty about deceiving him.
 
I suppose I knew Luke would never really love me, although I truly believe he cared about me. It was fairly obvious he had the hots for the Princess, and as he rose through the ranks, I felt he was moving away from me towards her. When I heard he’d been given his own command it felt like the last branch on the funeral pyre of our psuedo-relationship, and I really didn’t expect to see him after that, except in an official capacity. So I was more than a little surprised to find him on my doorstep that same evening, a bottle of wine in his hand and a huge smile plastered across his face.
 
As soon as the door closed behind him, he dropped the wine and pulled me into a hug, lifting my feet off the floor. ‘Did you hear?’
 
His enthusiasm was infectious and I found myself smiling as I ruffled his hair. ‘Yes, I did, Commander Skywalker.’
 
‘Don’t say that. I feel old as it is.’
 
‘You feel old?’ I pushed him playfully. ‘I’m nearly thirty. That’s old.’
 
He put his head on one side, still smiling. ‘What happened to “you’re only as young as the man you feel”?’
 
‘Perfectly good adage,’ I replied. ‘Now, why are you here?’
 
‘What do you mean?’ He frowned. ‘I’m here to celebrate my promotion, of course.’ He pulled me into a tighter hug.
 
‘I’d guessed you wanted to celebrate, Luke. I just want to know why you’re here rather than out with your buddies.’ I met his gaze. ‘Or with a certain princess.’
 
He had the decency to look a bit sheepish. ‘Leia’s off with Han on some mission to Ord Mantell.’
 
‘And the guys?’
 
‘We’ve got the day after tomorrow off, so we’re all going out tomorrow night to get roaring drunk. You’re invited, of course.’
 
‘So I’m third choice.’ I tried to look cross, but didn’t quite pull it off.
 
‘Certainly not, Kay. It’s just...’
 
I silenced him with a kiss. ‘I fit in to your busy schedule? I don’t mind, Luke.’
 
He sighed as he lay his head on my shoulder. ‘I don’t have time for relationships, Kay. When I’m not flying or training pilots, I always seem to be helping to set up or dismantle the base, or they send me off on some mission or other. I don’t even have time to practice with my lightsaber.’ He lifted his head and held my face as he looked into my eyes. ‘You’re the only one who understands. I don’t think I could have got through the past couple of years without you.’
 
He was so sincere, I felt tears pricking my eyes. ‘You would have managed, Luke. I’m sure lots of girls were just dying to get you into bed.’
 
He smiled. ‘I meant your friendship.’ The smile turned into a grin. ‘Although the other stuff has definitely helped. And I’m sure no-one else could have taught me as well as you have.’
 
‘Great,’ I replied. ‘So now I’m a sex instructor.’
 
‘And a bloody good one.’ He scooped me into his arms. ‘Come on, let’s go to bed.’
 

The sex was mind-blowing, as usual, probably because we saw so little of each other that we never had time to get bored. We touched and tasted each other as if for the first time and even tried a couple of new positions Luke had thought up all by himself (or so he claimed). Our coupling in those days was always wild, rampant, count-the-legs-and-divide-by-two sort of sex - although in public he still seemed the innocent young farm boy. I never figured out if that was a deliberate mask he wore in front of everyone else, or if it came naturally and the confidence he showed in front of me was the mask.
 
And yet, I never felt the urge to sleep with him every night; only when I was feeling lonely or sad, or just plain bored. Nine times out of ten it was Luke who came to me for sex, and I was usually happy to oblige. I think we just fulfilled a need; we got the sex thing out of the way so we could concentrate on our jobs.
 
Just as his confidence had increased, Luke’s body had also matured noticeably in the past couple of years, bulking up just a little. And he’d grown into a considerate, and occasionally  inventive, lover. As I lay in his arms, I looked up to see him staring off into space. ‘What are you thinking about, Luke?’
 
‘Hmmmm?’ He looked down at me and I saw him blush. ‘Oh, nothing.’ His face was so easy to read.
 
‘Leia.’
 
He hesitated just a second too long. ‘No I’m not.’
 
‘Don’t lie to me, Luke. It doesn’t suit you and you’re not very good at it.’ I pulled myself up until our faces were level, then I kissed him gently. ‘I love you, Luke. But I also love Wedge and Dack and Hobbie and all the others. Admittedly, you’re the only one I sleep with.’
 
He smiled. ‘Glad to hear it.’
 
‘Are you?’ I propped myself up on one elbow and gazed into his eyes, trying to see his thoughts. ‘If I decided to have a relationship with someone else, would you care? Would you even notice?’
 
‘Of course I would.’
 
I traced his jawline with my finger. ‘Luke, we have one of the weirdest relationships I’ve ever heard of. We’re sort of best friends that screw occasionally. But the only reason we’ve been exclusive until now is that neither of us has the time or the energy to commit to another person.’
 
He chewed his bottom lip. ‘Do you want to stop doing this?’
 
‘Not particularly. But I want you to tell the Princess how you feel about her, or at least ask her out. And if you do fall in love with her, or anyone else for that matter, I want you to tell me. Straight away. No messing about or trying to protect my feelings. Then we’ll stop.’ I kissed him again. ‘I want you to be happy.’
 
He pulled me in for a hug. ‘I’m happy right now.’
 
‘You are so cute.’ I kissed his nose. ‘Let’s take a shower.’
 
He grinned and rolled me onto my back. ‘Let’s not,’ he whispered. ‘At least, not yet.’
 
My skin started to tingle as he kissed and caressed his way down my body; he knew exactly which buttons to press. Of course, I had all but drawn him a map.
 

We finally made it to the shower a couple of hours later and, for a change, we shared a shower without having sex. I was pulling a comb through my hair and watching Luke get dressed, when both our comlinks went off at once. I took mine into the main room, leaving Luke in the bedroom to answer his. It was another evacuation order - the Imperials had found us again and were on their way. The transports would start lifting off in less than fifteen hours. Luke’s face looked grim as he came into the room, pulling on his jacket.
 
‘I guess that blows tomorrow night’s celebration,’ I said, trying to lighten the mood.
 
Luke smiled and pulled me into an embrace. ‘At least we had tonight.’
 
I kissed him then held him tightly. ‘Be careful, Luke.’
 
He grinned and kissed my forehead. ‘Always am. Suppose I’d better go see to my squadron.’
 
‘I’ll see you in the hanger.’
 
As he turned to go, he noticed the bottle of wine he’d dropped earlier. ‘Hey, we forgot to drink this.’
 
I took it from him and smacked his cute rear to encourage him out the door. ‘We’ll drink it when we’re settled on the new base. Now get a move on, Commander.’
 
A kiss and a smile and he was gone.
 

Hoth. So bloody cold it made me want to desert the Rebellion.
 
‘So who’s bright idea was this place, then?’
 
I peered up from the X-wing’s landing skids to see Wedge dressed in the warm gear they issued for outside patrols. ‘I haven’t a clue. You know they never tell us lowly techs anything,’ I replied.
 
He still looked serious. ‘Have you noticed that every base we’ve been on since Yavin has had steadily worse conditions? The Force knows what we’ll have to put up with on the next one.’
 
‘Oh, come on, Antilles. Perhaps they’ll never find us here. It’s pretty out of the way.’
 
He smiled, just a little. ‘I seem to remember you saying that about the last one.’
 
‘Well, maybe this one will be different.’
 
‘Maybe.’ He didn’t look convinced. Neither was I, to be honest. ‘Anyway,’ he said, ‘our esteemed Commander still hasn’t had a promotion celebration - are you free tonight?’
 
I was supposed to be studying, but I wasn’t going to miss this. ‘Nothing I can’t get out of,’ I replied.
 
‘Good. See you at the bar.’
 

I was late, as usual. I found the crew propping up the bar, most of them well on the way to being drunk.
 
I saw Wedge waving. ‘No dress tonight, Kay?’
 
‘Too damn cold, Antilles,’ I replied. ‘Now buy me a drink.’
 
‘At once, boss!’
 
As I watched Wedge stride off to the bar, I felt an arm slip round my waist and a chin rest on my shoulder. I turned slightly to check it was actually Luke and not someone trying their luck. The smell of alcohol was enough for me to take a quick step away. ‘Luke! What in hell’s name have you been drinking?’
 
‘Dunno,’ he replied, swaying slightly. ‘Wedge gave me it. S’nice, though.’
 
‘When are you going to learn not to drink anything that Correlian gives you?’
 
‘Awwww, don’t be hard on him, Kay,’ Luke replied. ‘He’s just helping me celebrate my promotion.’
 
‘You’re going to feel horrendous in the morning.’
 
‘I’m not on patrol ‘till the day after tomorrow. I’ll be recovered by then.’
 
‘You hope.’
 
Wedge arrived then with a glass of what looked like brandy. ‘There you go, Kay. Finest Cruvian brandy, all the way from Ord Mantell.’
 
I took a little sip and felt it burn it’s way down my throat. Delicious, but very potent. No wonder Luke was a bit drunk. ‘I take it Captain Solo is back, then.’
 
Wedge frowned at me. ‘How did you know I got it from him?’
 
‘Luke told me he’d gone to Ord Mantell.’
 
Wedge looked from me to Luke, and then back to me again. ‘Yeah. Well, he’s coming down later.’
 
‘Good,’ I replied. ‘I’ve got some parts for the Falcon he wanted.’

 
The night continued along the lines of every other excuse for a celebration that Wedge had ever come up with. After a few more drinks, the music holos went on, although few people bothered to dance. Once everyone was suitably sozzled, the off-key singing began, starting with songs insulting the Empire before the lyrics became more and more ‘rude’. I was propping up the bar listening to Dack’s rendition of ‘The Pilot’s Stick’ (and I thought he was such a quiet guy), when Luke came over and stood next to me.
 
‘Can we go yet?’ he asked, looking into his drink rather than at me.
 
‘Whatever do you mean, Commander?’ Two could play at that game.
 
He still didn’t look at me. ‘I think you know exactly what I mean.’
 
I had found an interesting spot on the opposite wall to occupy my attention. ‘Do tell.’
 
‘Come on, Kay. Your place or mine?’
 
‘I don’t know that you’re sober enough for either, flyboy.’
 
‘Haven’t you noticed I’ve been holding the same drink for the last two hours.’ He turned to look at me. ‘I think I’m sober enough for you.’
 
I took another sip of my drink. ‘Mine.’
 
‘Thanks. I’ll be along later.’
 

As I wandered back to my room, I yet again asked myself what the hell I was playing at. People were beginning to suspect something; Wedge and Solo had both given me an odd look when I left the party, and one of my junior techs had made some comment about my ‘young man’. He’d pay for that in the morning. I opened the door to my room, then locked it behind me; Luke was one of the few people who had an entry code to my room, assuming he actually turned up, of course.
 
As usual, the room was absolutely freezing. Not surprising, as the walls were ice; the whole base had been carved underground, with as little showing up top as we could get away with. I said my usual mantra as I stripped off my clothes and climbed into socks and thick pyjamas, ‘We’re safe. We’re safe.’ Feeling safe from the Empire was the only thing that made living on this ice-ball worthwhile. Some people seemed to get used to the cold fairly quickly; not me. And Luke was suffering even more, as he’d grown up in a desert. I cleaned up in the fresher as quickly as I could, then dived beneath the thick bed-cover.
 
I don’t know how long I’d been asleep when ice-cold hands under my pjs woke me up with a start.
 
Luke was grinning like an idiot. ‘Sorry. But you’re so lovely and warm.’
 
I shivered a bit as he pulled me closer and moved his hands round to my back. ‘I’d almost given up on you, Skywalker.’
 
His hands were beginning to warm up now, or was it just my back cooling down. ‘I got talking to the guys. I wasn’t going to disturb you, but then I thought...’
 
‘...a warm bed,’ I finished for him.
 
‘Better than that.’ He kissed me. ‘A warm bed with you in it.’
 

And that was the last time we made love. Two days later I was in the hanger, when Wedge came running over.
 
‘Did you hear about Luke?’ he said.
 
My heart felt like ice as I turned slowly to look at him, trying to remember to breathe. ‘What about Luke?’
 
‘He’s missing. Outside somewhere. Solo’s still out looking for him.’
 
‘But the doors,’ I could hardly get the words out, ‘the shield doors. They’re closed. I saw them.’ The look on Wedge’s face told me all I needed to know. ‘Oh, Wedge,’ I collapsed into his arms, sobbing.
 
We sat under the X-wing, Wedge holding me tight and rocking gently. ‘Shhhh, Kay. He’ll be alright. You’ll see.’
 
I managed to stop crying after a while, and looked up at him. ‘You knew, didn’t you.’
 
He shrugged, stroking my hair. ‘About you and Luke? I guessed something was going on. Didn’t know exactly what.’ He brushed away some of the tears still trickling down my face. ‘How long?’
 
‘Since Yavin.’
 
‘Really?’ Wedge looked positively shocked. ‘Why the big secret, then?’
 
‘He doesn’t love me, Wedge.’
 
Now he just looked angry. ‘He’s using you. You deserve better, Kay.’
 
‘Don’t be an idiot,’ I said. ‘I’m a big girl, I can take care of myself. I’m using him as much as he’s using me.’
 
‘Do you love him?’
 
‘I ... I don’t know.’ I burst into tears again. ‘What if he dies? Wedge, it’s so cold out there, his chances can’t be good. What if...’
 
He pulled me into a tight embrace again. ‘Luke’s tougher than he looks. And if Solo finds him, well, he’s got a survival pack. I’m sure they’ll be OK.’ He sighed. ‘Come on. I’ll take you back to your room.’
 

Wedge stayed with me all night. We sat on the sofa drinking endless cups of tea and I could finally talk to someone about my relationship (or lack of it) with Luke Skywalker. Wedge kept smiling and shaking his head, trying to understand. He listened to me as I talked myself hoarse, he held me when I cried, and he stayed when I finally fell asleep in his arms. He left me dozing on the sofa, promising to let me know as soon as there was any news. Sure enough, not long after dawn, my comm beeped.
 
‘He’s in pretty bad shape, Kay, but he’s alive.’
 
I closed my eyes to stop the tears. ‘Thanks, Wedge.’
 
‘I’ll hang about for a bit, see if I can get a med report.’
 

Two days later I heard Luke was out of the bacta, and I decided to go see him. As I walked up the corridor towards the med centre, I was first passed by an angry-looking Princess, then by a furious-looking Han Solo, his Wookiee co-pilot sniggering behind him. I peeped into the room to see if Luke was alone; he was sitting up in bed, a huge smile across his face.
 
‘Kay!’
 
I couldn’t stop myself then; I ran over and hugged him. ‘I’m glad you’re alright. We were worried.’
 
‘We?’
 
I wrinkled my nose at him. ‘Wedge knows.’
 
Luke just sighed. ‘Had to happen eventually.’
 
As I looked into his eyes, trying to ignore the scars on his face, I sensed something, like I could read his mind. ‘We’ve got to stop, haven’t we,’ I said.
 
He nodded, his hand reaching up to caress my cheek. ‘She kissed me, Kay. I don’t think we can carry on...’
 
I put my finger gently on his lips. ‘It’s okay. I understand. And I don’t want to go through what I went through two nights ago ever again. I think we got too close, Luke, closer than we said we would.’
 
‘We had fun, though, didn’t we,’ he grinned.
 
‘We sure did.’
 
‘Any regrets?’
 
‘Not yet,’ I replied. ‘Ask me in a couple of weeks, when I have to watch you with your princess.’ I squeezed his hands as gently as I could. ‘Take care, Luke.’
 
‘You too, Kay. See you around.’
 
Then I just stood up and left.
 

That was all about fifteen years ago. Luke is now a Jedi Master, actually the Jedi Master, and I’m teaching engineering on Correlia (Wedge would have loved that!). I finally got my blonde four years ago; he’s the love of my life and we have a little boy. And I’ve just heard that Luke is getting married. I’m so happy for him, I’m crying as I type out a little message to him. I don’t know if he’ll read it - we haven’t really stayed in touch and I’m sure he’ll get a million goodwill messages - but I have to send something.

“Luke - hope you and your lady will be happy forever. With love from Kay, your instructor.”
 
 

THE END

DEFINITELY
 

So - was this too weird? Feedback much appreciated.