Summary: Sick of all those extremely unrealistic (wait this is an oxymoron) star wars fanfics? Then this is for you, this is how it really goes down at the Jedi Temple.

::This is the real story, of seven strangers (Qui, Obi, Adi, Mara, Luke, Amidala, Anakin ) picked to live in a house and show what happens when people stop being friendly and start being real, the real world Coruscant. Background: These seven strangers were selected in their diverse personalities to live in an extravagant flat in the Jedi Temple of Coruscant. Their job is to successfully maintain each of their elite positions in the temple. Qui, Obi, Luke, and Anakin are students and must maintain a passing grade in each class, Adi must aid the heads of the institution, Mara must handle all of the temples foreign affairs and Amidala must successfully learn how to operate a spaceship.::

::We see a closed door with loud, sexual sounds coming from it, Adi walks by and rolls her eyes.::

::In the confessional, Adi::: I’m so sick of it! This is like a damn brothel! Everytime I turn around we’ve got Amidala and Anakin all over each other, which is totally disgusting considering she’s like twice his age, then we’ve got Mara and Luke who are a little more subtle about it, but still! Then there’s Obi trying to get in my pants and Qui, both are probably the biggest players in the whole galaxy, but then again can you blame them? I mean if I was that suave and hot and could get girls that easily I’d probably do the same. And then lastly you’ve got me, the Bi who hasn’t gotten any for over three months, and face it, that’s sad.In the kitchen/bar Luke: How are you my love? Mara: Just fine my love. Did Qui and Obi ever come home last night? Luke: I dunno about Qui but Ob.... We hear talking in the background. No no no, don’t call me, I’ll call you. Yes I’ll see you around. Uh huh. Buh bye. ::door slams:: They just don’t get it do they? Obi Walks into the kitchen. Mara: And who was that? Obi: Can’t remember. What’s for breakfast? Luke: Oatmeal Obi: Again!? Luke: Hey it’s the only thing that I can make, and if you don’t like it, well you can make your own! Obi: Fine prissy boy I’ll make my own fucking breakfast! Luke: FINE! Obi: FINE! Mara saucily: I like your oatmeal...Luke: That’s not all you like...They exchange suggestive glances and dash upstairs while Adi comes down still pissed off about Amidala and Anakin’s loudness.

She walks into the kitchen with her robe on and pours some coffee. Obi: And how did you sleep love? Adi: Fine until I was rudely awakened....AGAIN! Obi flirtatiously walks behind her and starts to give her a back massage. She shoves his arms off of her and turns around. Adi: Don’t get fresh with me, I’m not one of those stupid bimbo hos you bring home that you can lay and ditch. Obi: Still leaning towards the lesbian side are we? Adi: No actually and don’t get so cocky, you know, women CAN reject you. Obi: Yes, but they always end up fucking me later. Adi:Uuggghhh! You are such an ass hole! Adi smacks him in the face and then picks up her coffee and goes upstairs to take a shower.

Obi in the confessional: Here’s the thing about Adi, see spends to much time analyzing how "the world is full of bullshit" and less time having fun. She needs to realize that the world today is not about love, or peace, or fairness, or equality. It’s about sex, drugs, sex, techno music, and sex. See, that’s what I’m here for. Sooner or later, we’re going to get her drunk, put a little mind whammy on her and then she will be unable to resist all that is Obi. He adds a mischievous grin. Who knows, it may be tonight.

Later that day at lunch break Qui-Gon walks over to the table, limping slightly. His lip is scabbed, his eye is black and he has a tired look about him. Adi: What the hell happened to you? Qui: Let’s just say my escort for the night was a little....rough? Everyone starts laughing including Qui, until he stops because of the pain. Obi: Anyone up for some bar hopping tonight? Adi...?Adi: Maybe, if Mara goes. Mara: I’ll go if Luke goes. Luke: I’ll go. Amidala: Anakin and I already have plans, but thanks anyway. Obi: Oh yeah, I forgot, junior’s too young to get in. Anakin: If I really wanted to I could get in, but then again I don’t want to end up like you. Obi: Yeah, handsome, intelligent, and punctual. Anakin: You bastard! I could waste you any day. Two hits, me hitting you, and you hitting the ground. Obi: Yeah, you and what army? Miss I’m-such-a-goody-two shoes over here? Luke: Break it up you guys! Qui signals to Adi: Hey special advisor! Would it be at all possible if you could, um, take me to the medi-wing and come up with an excuse for my, uh, condition? Please? He smiles innocently Adi: I suppose so, but you owe me big time! The two walk out of sight, but Obi and Anakin still give each other evil glances

Amidala in the confessional: Hey, I know he’s younger then me, but why is that so important? It’s okay for guys to date younger girls, so why is there a problem with dating younger guys? I don’t care what they say anyway, I mean I would have to be pretty stupid to actually listen to anything Obi says anyway. He’s a disgusting, ignorant, stupid player. Out of everyone in the house I respect him the least. I’m undoubtedly sure everyone else does too.

Qui in the confessional: Obi, he’s naive. But, I still feel I can relate to him the most. He has a temper and an attitude, but he’s a pretty fun guy to just hang around with.

Anakin in the confessional: I hate that son of a bitch.

Obi in the confessional: They’re all okay I guess. Qui’s my dog, Adi’s my girl, Mara and Amidala are all right, Luke and Anakin are sons of bitches. If I really wanted to, I could steal both of their chicks, at once maybe, but see I’m a nice guy and I don’t pull that shit.

Adi and Obi are sitting on a couch in the living room. Obi: So I told him, hey listen you ass hole, if I tell you to shut the fuck up I’m not kidding around. Adi (laughing): You know what your problem is Obi? You try too much to be macho. It’s time you realized that you just need to relax and not care about what other people think. Then you’ll be a happy and better person. Obi: You know maybe you’re right love, but you can’t make cake with pepper. Abi: Then change into some eggs. Obi: It ain’t that easy love. I wish it were, but it isn’t. Adi: It’s a lot easier than you think it is.